A Real New Moon
by Whoris Pelan
Summary: Bella and Edward are having issues with their relationship, are things to going to break apart because of this.
1. Chapter 1

So dis is my first fanfic evars, and I want to tank triplebeard for helping with da editing

Edward Cullen dont bother talking to me unless you are actually going to talk

thanks...

Bella Swan Aim has this thing called an away message

it usually means that the person is away

like, i was away, gone, not at my computer, busy, elsewhere, etc

Edward Cullen you know what you did. if you dont, find someone else to talk to

Bella Swan good thing i do know what i did

Edward Cullen Then why do you do it?

Bella Swan do what? go celebrate september birthdays with jacob? cause thats what i was doing

Edward Cullen You couldn't wait one minute?

Bella Swan no

Edward Cullen Look, I don't mind talking to you when you have problems because I care about you. But I'm not sure if I'm wasting my time though because you obviously don't care about me.

Why don't you go ask Jacob what you should do?

Bella Swan why should i talk to you when you make it quite clear that im happy with my "problem"

Edward Cullen i dont know what you are happy with, and you called it a "problem" to begin with. is it a problem or not to you?

Edward Cullen i dont know why you should talk to me, i thought we had a close relationship. apparently not

Bella Swan then you should know me better

Edward Cullen how?

Edward Cullen so its my fault?

Edward Cullen im nt going to help apparently...

call me if you want

Edward Cullen i dont want to bother you any further since i dont know you

Bella Swan If you knew me at all you wouldnt have to question my motives for going out to Vampire land and you would understand that it is not my choice to have to share a room with Jacob, even if two other people will be in there

Edward Cullen how can i know you? i only know what you tell me anymore.

i know thats not your fault. i already said what i would do if i were you

Bella Swan i told you what i wanted, you chose not to believe me

Edward Cullen why should i have believed you?

Edward Cullen how can i completely trust you and Jacob?

i trusted you both before because i thought i knew you, but i was disappointed then, several times

you could be anywhere and i wouldnt know. how should i know you better and why are you so mad that i dont because i cant?

Bella Swan yes, Jacob and I are going to use the fact that we are on the other side of the country, alone in a hotel room to our advantage. how did you know? good thing you wont be able to be there to stop any of it, after all were going to do that just to spite you.

thanks Edward

Edward Cullen can you blame me?

Edward Cullen you havent answered any of my questions. you are just blaming me

Edward Cullen im not like you, i dont have hundreds of friends i can just talk to. in fact, i only have 2 close friends, you and the cole train. right now the cole train is being an asshole. i hope its just today, and im not finally getting to know him... it may not be a big deal to you that this goes on, but it is for me.  
i want this to end.

Bella Swan dont you realize how much you hurt me?

and no, i dont have hundreds of friends i can talk to. in fact, im quite miserable without you

Edward Cullen i dont

Bella Swan obviously

Edward Cullen thats not very fair. i dont think youre considering how i feel...  
that kind of one sidedness isnt good for a healthy relationship, even one between just friends

Bella Swan oh? and how do you feel about me going to Vampire landfornia

what do you really think of me and how do you expect to have a relationship at all if you dont even trust me

Edward Cullen i dont like you going to Vampire landfornia at all

theres not much of a relationship to be had if i cant feel comfortable sharing my feelings -and thats not to say i dont want a relationship Bella Swan well im going, and im going to go to be with Alice. if you cant understand that, then im sorry

and since when have you ever felt uncomfortable

Edward Cullen i can see why youd want to go with Alice; understanding and agreeing are two different things

what makes you feel that ive never been uncomfortable?

Bella Swan why should i not go?

well, you havent really been telling me whats up have you? you only get pissy cause im going to Vampire land

Edward Cullen its just a dumb idea.. take your feelings out of it and look at it from someone elses perspective.

im being pissy? like i shouldnt care?.. because i thought you wanted to know my opinion... did you want me to agree with you or did you want to know how i feel?  
because it seems like you want me to agree with you so that you can feel better about your decision.  
If you are certain, then why do you care if i dont like it or not?

Bella Swan you give your opinion, but you dont give reason for it, how am i supposed to value it

Edward Cullen "i did, just not directly. if you want to know... the situation feels inappropriate. if you and Alice are going to make the effort to go out there, then the boys should be able to make the effort to check into base.

you havent even said how Jacob feels about it"

Bella Swan "Jacob knows that im not going out there to see Jacob, and hes happy for me that im going. but that has nothing to do with you"

and since when do you care about being appropriate or inappropriate? do you actually participate in our conversations?  
and do you think it would be more or less appropriate if you went. what if it was a bunch of us girls and them? what if it was just me? what if i didnt go, would that make the whole trip better in your eyes?

Edward Cullen if you didnt go, we wouldnt be having this conversation. i dont care what Alice does, i only care about what you do. i have always cared.

if suddenly things dont "concern" me, then it doesnt seem like this would concern me either, and there wouldnt be any point to this discussion.

i wont tell you how to run your life, but if you ask for my opinion, dont get mad at me for giving it

Bella Swan why are you so upset that im going?


	2. Chapter 2

AITHOR'S nite I want to tank the tribple beard again for the spellinz checking she did. He daso did da swedishn translators. I was disspointeds inn the lack of rewievs , cause I need feedbacks for good plots.

Edward Cullen because i really care about you. youre an amazing girl. it would really hurt me to have anything happen to you

Bella Swan do you really think anything is going to happen to me, or that im going to be doing something i shouldnt?

Edward Cullen you dont know exactly what will happen, like what situations youll be put in and how people have changed. you dont know what other things might occur and people might do. not to mention youll be so far away from everything youre familiar with

Bella Swan how many times do i have to tell you not to worry about me? and its not like ill be alone all the time

Edward Cullen ok i wont worry, in fact i dont care. next time, dont bother asking me, because it clearly doesnt matter what i say

Bella Swan why is it not ok for me to go to Vampire landfornia with people i know but perfectly fine for me to go all the way to south america with a group of strangers, when only one other girl is going?

Edward Cullen its your life, it doesnt concern me. obviously im not much a part of it anyway

Bella Swan how can you say that?

Edward Cullen because it seems thats what you are trying to tell me

Bella Swan well it seems to me that the only purpose i serve to you is to keep you from being too bored. someone to talk to when you have nothing else to do, or the cole train isnt making you happy enough Edward, youre my best friend, does that even matter to you?

Edward Cullen thats exactly what ive been feeling of you talking to me too. that im just there to entertain you. Bella, when we arent on good terms, my whole day falls apart and youre all i can think of. i get almost sick when i think i dont mean anything to you.

Bella Swan oh you think youve had a bad day? dont even go there

Edward Cullen then we both must be bored a lot...  
i wouldnt drop everything im doing for anyone; i would for you

Edward Cullen i read that on your facebook. what happened? did you get your money?

Bella Swan yea, just the banker was really stupid

Bella Swan i love you Edward, i really am lost without you

Edward Cullen thank god...  
Bella Swan im also really glad that i had a spare set of car keys here, rather than just the ones my dad has...

Bella Swan my banker makes me too broke to afford a locksmith

Edward Cullen well i guess i should tell you that with each day we talk, and all the time that ive gotten to know you, ive fallen in love with you... i really dont know what else to say

Bella Swan i sleep with Jacob every night

thats all that i know of what to say

Edward Cullen i wear the bracelet you made me all the time

Edward Cullen because thats all i can do

Edward Cullen "you havent answered any of my questions. you are just blaming me

Edward Cullen im not like you, i dont have hundreds of friends i can just talk to. in fact, i only have 2 close friends, you and the cole train. right now the cole train is being an asshole. i hope its just today, and im not finally getting to know him... it may not be a big deal to you that this goes on, but it is for me.  
i want this to end."

Bella Swan "dont you realize how much you hurt me?

and no, i dont have hundreds of friends i can talk to. in fact, im quite miserable without you

Edward Cullen i dont"

Bella Swan obviously I like MCR

Edward Cullen "thats not very fair. i dont think youre considering how i feel...  
that kind of one sidedness isnt good for a healthy relationship, even one between just friends

Bella Swan "oh? and how do you feel about me going to Vampire landfornia

`what do you really think of me and how do you expect to have a relationship at all if you dont even trust me

Bella Swan i carry a knife on me at all times, sometimes more...  
and rapitst. which ive kept extra close on hand in some rather shady areas

Edward Cullen i wouldnt expect any less

Bella Swan which is why i tell you that you dont need to worry about me, ive got good back up if a good kick to the groin ever fails me

Edward Cullen ok Bella.  
i love you, so i care about you, and therefore worry about you because i cant help but want to protect you from everything. i just want you to be happy. i want your life to be better in some way because of me. whatever that would require me to do or to be.

Bella Swan you do make my life better :) in so many ways i just cant go through this again. things went so badly with Jacob, i dont want to do that to you, or Jacob.

Bella Swan but i do need you, and im not willing to give you up

Edward Cullen :)  
i understand. just know that i will always be there for you, whatever you need. i love you.

Bella Swan i love you too. can you promise me though that nothing is going to change? i cant lose you

Edward Cullen i promise, until the day i die, and even then, if there is a then

Edward Cullen what if i get a girlfriend, i mean she might take up all my time and everything...

Bella Swan youre one of the very few people who can make me smile at any time, especially at 2am

we also should really go to bed. i do have classes tomorrow

Edward Cullen well, honestly, i didnt like sarah not because of her completely, i could have liked her for herself. but i couldnt love her because i love you...  
where does that leave me

Cole Train " h varf r s dysterhet gamle v n, du varit i da pub?"

Edward Cullen i cant love anyone like i love you, i just cant...

Edward Cullen " its not you cole train its me"

Cole Train "Oh baby orsak, var jag k r min delorans"

Bella Swan yes, um, girls

thats the reason why i told jed about sarah. i knew that if you guys got together that i would never be able to have the same relationship with you. we couldnt have what we have now. and i told jed because it broke my heart so much not knowing if she would be able to make you happy

Edward Cullen dont let that smile go away, because i always will love you Bella, i can promise

Bella Swan i will always love you too, even if we never do end up together. but i promise you that someday you will find someone who can really give you their love. i dont want to sound cliche, but it is true. just be sure to get my permission first. i dont want another dan/ashley ordeal :/

Edward Cullen i actually told sarah about you because she asked where my bracelet was from. i told her that i loved you because she and i were just dating and i really just wanted to get to know her. she told me to tell you my feelings. that was several weeks ago...

and she wouldn't make me happy...

Edward Cullen well with my girl/ person meeting skills i might break the cliche, lol

Edward Cullen and it is getting, actually has gotten, way late.  
i have class tomorrow as well

Bella Swan yea, that might do in the whole having a chance idea, but at least you were honest! which is great :)

i wouldnt recommend telling every girl you meet that, but it is good to let them know about our closeness

Bella Swan bed, on the other hand, sounds amazing

havent slept much lately

Edward Cullen yeah, sarah is a strange girl in her own way... we didnt really date eachother for love, just because it seemed like a good thing to do. she and i are friends, we can tell eachother literally anything because we dont mean much to eachother. lol kinda screwed up, but it worked for a time... sort of :)

Edward Cullen agreed goodnight Bella sleep well

Edward Cullen I like cole train too

Bella Swan well, i suppose its progress :) cant be too shy now

ive never actually "dated" anyone. Jacob is the first boyfriend ive ever had, and we didnt really date. it just kinda happened. so dont ask advice from me on that topic lol

well, you can ask, im just not the best person for the job

Bella Swan goodnight Edward sweet dreams

Edward Cullen its ok. thats not even an issue now anyway.

i think you were right on the sleep thing

Edward Cullen goodnight Bella you too 


	3. Lustfully Tripping

Thanks agins for the reviews but you needs to stop flamen triplebeard. She said he used spell check. I needs 3 posttives revews before I upload teh next chapter

Bella tripped along pridfully. She was on her way to meet her lover, Cole Train, for Valentine's Day. She siled to see a werewolf hopping along, carrying an alice in its mouth.

Bella was almost on the moon when she came across an iridescent cake, lying alone on a hairy plate. "That must be a treat from my hard bear," she said to herself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked burly, so she ate it.

It gave her the most swedish tingling sensation in her back. "How unusual!" she said and cotinued tripping to see Cole Train.

When Cole Train came out to meet her, she took one look and fell over.

"What is it?" Bella cried asianly.

"Your tongue! And your arm!" Cole Train said. "They're steriored! Can't you feel it?"

Bella felt her tongue and her arm. They were indeed quite steriored. "Oh, no!" Bella said. "I'm a man!" She, or rather, he started to cry. "It must have been that iridescent cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"

"I didn't leave you any cake," Cole Train said. "I got you a jed. It must have been that harder man who lives nearby. He acts a litle sinfully, ever since he sucked a vagina."

"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a man?" Bella sobbed.

"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Cole Train said anally, "but I actually prefer men. And I think your tongue is really sparkily like that."

"Really?" Bella dried his tears. Bella kissed Cole Train and it was an entirely shiny sensation, like a jew looking for his jew gold.

They spent the night having entirely shiny sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.

Everything was rather awkward after that.

There was nothing lft for her anymore, nothing sucked her, all was swedish. So today, Valentine's Day, she was going on the moon to become a hard vagina.  
Bella screamed pridfully and ran but the snow werewolf chased her until she tipped over a tree root. Then the snow werewolf sucked her lustfully.

"Nobody does that to my little Swedish Vagina," Cole Train screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow werewolf through the tongue.  
Bella's desire was enflamed. Her tongue throbbed and all her thoughts were to suck Cole Train like a werewolf. Bella caressed Cole Train's iridescent arm and he responded. They came together anally, and their joining was as bigger as their battle, and also much louder.

"Ah, my sweet vagina!" Bella groaned and sucked Cole Train as sinfully as she could.

"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"... 


End file.
